Sunday, November 28, 2004

Thanksgiving Weekend!

Man, this break ruled. I mean really really ruled. It was the kind of weekend that makes you remember why people rock. It started with the traditional Bloomfield-Montclair massacre...err... football game. I think the score was 21 to somethin that wasn't quite so high. Anyway, the game wasn't all that important. Everybody was at the game, and the band was awesome to the max. There was a bitchin' sweet rainbow, and we got into a "You Can Call Me Al" war with the other band. They didn't stand a chance as the '04 brass section made a surprise appearance. Sam, Jim, Moob, Andrew, and I "borrowed" some freshman instruments and joined the mayhem. The freshman trombone player asked if I wanted his flip folder, and I just smiled and started to play. This was OUR song.

Thanksgiving at Tim's(my aunt's boyfriend) was fantastic. Good food, good people. A perfect evening, I must say. There was this guy there who decided that I looked like Jack Osbourne, "in a good way". I guess it's the hair...

The next day was a total blast. Bowling with EVERYONE! I still suck (my average of 85 was actually better than usual!) but that's not the point. After bowling we went to Willie's diner - none of that Nevada crap this time! :-) Then we went over to Andrew's house to watch a movie, and then a few of us went to Sam's to play the card game Apples to Apples. I think we're all going to hell for that game, but hey, it was fun!

God, this holiday rules. Now it's back to school, and while I love it here, I really am feeling some homesickness. This weekend was amazing. I can't wait for Christmas!

Thursday, November 18, 2004

The best article ever written

Here's something to pass the time:

I don't think I really have to comment on this one, except that, for once, I agree: let's get the fuck outta here! We want to form the U.C.A., and apparently the conservatives of the world want to kick us out. We agree on it, we have congressmen representing both of us... do I have to draw a diagram?

I like the part about "godliness vs devilishness" the best, personally. I'd like to point out that, though the author draws a parallel to Jonathan Swift's "A Modest Proposal", this is nothing of the sort. He even states, "As an admitted "modest proposal" (a la Swift's satiric story of the same name), it is nevertheless serious in pointing out the cancer that continues to threaten our body politic." This nutcase believes what he writes! I guess I shouldn't be surprised, the website's viewpoints come from Bob Novak and Ann Coulter. cough LUNATICS!cough

Thanks to Rachel, who pointed out this article.

Thursday, November 11, 2004


Brace yourselves, democrats, 'cuz this might be the last time Bush makes a decision with a democrat in mind...

Tuesday, November 09, 2004

Facts and Figures

Hey, do you like hard evidence that proves Bushites are either misinformed or just plain dumb? Sure, we all do! That's why I'm bringing to you this wonderful scientific poll!

It turns out that Bush supporters are grossly uninformed about key issues concerning terrorism, the Iraq war, the link between them, and official stances by the government on them. Ouch. Now I know you're thinking, "Well, maybe this is one of those 'liberal' polls that's designed just so people like Kevin can have shit to post on blogs like this." I'm glad you grumbled that, because if you look at the source, you'll find that the poll was conducted by a very respectible non-partisan organization.

So what does all this mean? It means that:
1) The Democrats are monumental failures at conducting a presidential campaign. They got an 80 mile per hour straight-as-hell fastball from Mariano Rivera and missed completely. They might never get a chance at such an opportunity again.

2) There is still hope for the nation! How can the fact that most of the country is clueless be of any help? Simple! We know that the minds of the voters can be swayed if we can provide them with hard, believable fact.

So take heart, anti-conservatives! In the words of the Bloomfield cheerleaders when the football team is down by 20-somethin' points, "We can still win!" Maybe not this election (Though I am reserving judgment on that until the mandatory Ohio recount comes back : ) ), but in the future.

Thanks to kpd and her blog, for posting this poll!

Saturday, November 06, 2004

Evolution vs Creationism

I thought this one would be obvious. I mean, we can all agree that creationism has no scientific proof, right? Then why the hell is it being taught in schools?

Well, we'll give each side a chance to defend itself, just to see if creationism deserves a place in biology class.

1) It's in the Bible. Shit, that separation of church and state thing is gonna come into play. That always screws me!

2) It's elegant. I mean, a 4000 year old Earth is a lot simpler to understand, right?

3) It's in the Bible. Wait, did we do this one yet?

Strong points, I must admit. Now, on to...

1) There's actually a scientific theory about it. Yay, science in science classes!

2) We can observe it. Like that moth that changed colors that one time in Europe somewhere... Fuck, I don't remember anything from bio. I blame the media. And the teachers.

3) Ummmm..... dinosaurs?

I'll leave it up to you to decide. My heart is torn. On the one hand, creationism is creepy and evolution seems to be pretty solid as far as theories go. On the other hand, I know Wisconsin bio students are going to think it's hilarious, and let's face it, a class on creationism would be so much fun!

We're Under Attack!

Ok, so this military plane on a live-fire exercise decides that it would be fun to strafe a school in NJ. WTF!?! What did we ever do to them? There's a larger problem here than just having schools being shot at. It was an accident, but I think that in order to keep this situation from happening again, the military should really stop designing their practice targets to look like school buildings. I mean, the Columbine thing was a long time ago, and I dont think air support would have stopped those kids anyway. Unless the military thinks that terrorist boot camps are being disguised as elementary schools... that would explain it...

Anyway, I propose that the U.S. military should stop shooting up elementary schools in the name of freedom. But that's just my opinion.

Here's the link to the article.

Friday, November 05, 2004

Hey, look, a voting miscalculation in Ohio!

What a surprise. yawn.

So, a precinct with 500 people in it managed to vote for Mr. President 4,000 times. You ever notice how this never happens in the democrat's favor?

Quick, which candidate has smarter followers?

Click here for another compelling reason to flee the red states and form a more perfect union!

Oh, and props to New Jersey for a stellar performance in the above list!

edit: I'm not sure if this report is entirely reliable, because IQ numbers by state are almost always a little iffy. Still, the trend itself is probably pretty accurate.

REM Rocks NY, makes me feel better

After the election, I've felt a lingering depression. Four years ago, Bush's ascent to the White House throne was marred by scandal: he had lost the popular vote, and the Supreme Court had made a ruling that harkens back to Dred Scott in how horrible it was, blocking the recount and ending the chance to learn the truth about the election. For me, and for other progressives, anger was our first response to the election. The highest office in the country had been stolen! We marched at the inauguration, vehemently protesting the result. Throughout the presidency, we were able to cling to the fact that we had not elected Bush to the presidency.

Four years later, we do not have that touchstone to anger. Bush won, plain and simple. The evangelical Christians, who apparently are scared that they might turn gay without proper legislation, flocked to the polls in crucial swing states. I find myself checking over and over, hoping that maybe, just maybe, some scandal will arise for me to turn my anger on. But none has, and probably none will. There is a void where my anger once helped fuel my determination to bring about change in our government, and only depression seems to fill it.

Then, tonight, I went to an REM concert at Madison Square Garden. Michael Stipe and Co. rocked the house, and Stipe voiced my emotions, saying, "This is a very strange Thursday. I don't really know what to talk about, so I'll just let my music speak for me." I listened to the brilliance that is REM, from the opening of "It's the End of the World As We Know It" to the closing of "Man on the Moon". The depression washed away with the music, and though I am still saddened by the direction our country seems headed, the depression is gone.

Thank you, REM, for the concert, and for everything else you give.

Wednesday, November 03, 2004

Welcome to my Blog

Hey virtually non-existent audience,
This is my new blog. For the record, this is also a sad day in the history of America. Somehow, despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary(the Redskins lost!), G dubya seems to have won the election. Good job, Ohio. And Florida. And other such states. Anyhoo, since it seems evident to me that this will be the death-knell of our glorious republic, it is time to form a new, stronger, and more streamlined nation. I give you....


Okay, so the way this works is: the Pacific coast, the Northeast, and the Great Lakes states secede. Barack Obama is appointed interim president of our new nation, and the capital will be located in Illinois. I know, New York is cooler, but hey, it doesn't have Obama. Then, we unite with Canada as one super-nation. We suddenly have superior healthcare, better water, and more mooses than ever before! Plus, the "old" U.S. gets to keep the war. Bonus for us!

Welcome to the UCA. Enjoy your stay!